Julian LeMont

In recent years Bulgaria has increasingly become popular for western visitors, particularly since the country’s unexpected admission to the European Union in 2007. Since then, trade and tourism have been booming, particularly along the scenic coastline of the Black Sea. Despite such promising developments, life for the average Bulgarian is still full of economic hardship, corruption and mismanagement. And inspite of Bulgaria’s joining the EU, views towards ethnic and sexual diversity are still prejudiced and discriminatory. So many a gay Bulgarian boy has had to turn his back to seek economic fortune and sexual fulfillment in more tolerant affluent societies abroad. Gradually, however, the climate for gays and lesbians in Bulgaria is improving, and particularly in urban areas such as Sofia, Plovdiv and Varna, a sizeable gay community has grown with local web portals such as www.gepime.com catering to a new generation of young Bulgarians ready to leave a past of communism and corruption behind and sexually explore their way forward towards a better, sexually more diverse future.

As I was preparing to spend a late summer along the Bulgarian Black Sea coast, I touched base with some local guys and was profoundly impressed by their open sexual views and handsome looks with endless sexy profiles on gepime.com. My gateway was the seaside town of Varna. Bulgaria’s third largest and among its most beautiful cities. It is also known as the summer capital of Bulgaria, boasting superb weather, a gorgeous coastline along the Black Sea as well as beautiful buildings and landscaped parks in a well-planned downtown. Among my local contacts, a studly, young, dark-blond Varna boy stood out with a great muscular body, soft slightly Slavik facial features and strong sex appeal. We met at the famous orthodox cathedral downtown and took an instant liking to each other. The attraction was so tangible and real, as we basked in each other’s sexual aura and strolled together down Varna’s pedestrian zone, stopping for coffee at HAPPY, Bulgaria’s version of TGIF (www.happy.bg). We then continued towards PRIMORSKI PARK near the coastline, and as our day went on, found ourselves tempted time and again to fool around a bit somewhere in the park but at a safe distance from families and other visitors there. It was mostly innocent bantering, though, as we did not want to get caught by anyone, and even less by local authorities, for engaging in sexual behavior in public. We agreed to meet again later that night following his classes in economics and after my own dinner plans with local friends.

My dining buddies, a handsome Bulgarian and his German boyfriend, were pleasantly surprised when I mentioned my afternoon experience, as they had never heard of IVO, my studly Bulgarian, and expressed concern he may be another prototypical closet case. After all, so many locals tend to repress their true sexual selves out of fear of homophobia. My friends were right – when Ivo contacted me later, he was visibly embarrassed about coming to meet me in a packed public bar downtown, and even more so in the presence of my two other friends. When he arrived, he shyly glanced around the bar and quickly suggested we leave. The rest went extremely well, needless to say, as once settled in my hotel room at the infamously cruisy downtown CHERNO MORE Hotel with splendid views from my balcony, my young studly Bulgarian and I made out for hours at perfect ease with each other. Nothing could have been more perfect – I was fortunate enough to get a spacious corner room at the highest floor, and noone could see us on my balcony as we started out exploring each other to the max both inside and outside on the balcony for a true taste of cultural exchange. The backdrop of Varna at night, the port lights and the Black Sea made for a perfect setting for a for our real-life Bulgarian porn fantasy- as both of us fully devoured each other’s toned muscular bodies, took turns pounding each other and several times exploded in passion.

Later that night, however, Ivo got dressed and left, as his family expected him back home and he did not want to raise suspicion. We made plans to see each other upon my return to Varna after my other stops on the Black Sea, Nessebar, Sozopol and Burgas. Yet his odd behaviour did not stop there, as I was soon to find out. A few days before my return to Varna I contacted him on-line and he wrote back that, although our attraction was real, he could only be “gay for pay”, being a poor student in a homophobic society – so “next time you must pay, baby”. I was in shock and disappointed, wondering how someone can first enjoy such an amazing time with someone, only to degrade the whole thing to a free-sample screw before the meter kicks in. I replied he obviously must have paid good attention to his course work on Bulgarian Economics and never heard from him again. My local friends in Varna were not surprised, common as such behaviour is all around Eastern Europe and the Balkans with such economic hardship and homophobia.

With every visit to Varna and encounter with local boys I have had since then, basking in the memory of my erotic first-hand taste of Bulgarian culture, I have been slowly able to build a sense of closure, increasingly at peace with myself and what happened. With every view of the port and cathedral of Varna illuminated at night I feel and trust that all we did was genuine and true. At least my actions were, and I felt so were his. Yet often it is hard to shake off where we are from and how we grow up, culturally, socially and sexually. And we then often wind up as our own worst enemies. Standing on my hotel balcony with views of the Black Sea and the Varna skyline at night, I then made a vow to celebrate the genuine, seize it for good and make it shine. And many times since then, I have been consciously and passionately celebrating what is true and genuine in every encounter, both in Bulgaria and beyond.